Daria: "The Road Worrier, Part 2"; or "Last Chance for Gas before the Dystopia Freeway."
Review:

Setting: The Apocalyptic wasteland of what was once Lawndale, deep in the heart of darkest America. After the years of Middle East conflict, global warming, El Nino, the stock market crash of 2002, and the take-over of inanimate Objects (Jane was a little of in her prediction. Rather than a violent takeover on April 1, Objects won majorities in the House and Senate, and took the Presidency in November of 2004).

In this ravaged, fuel starved, and polluted landscape, we find Trent and Daria married and living together in the ruins of the Lawndale city hall. Trent leaves one night in his car, in an attempt to trade a stack of old vinyl phonograph records for some corn chips and salsa, but then fails to return.

Fearing that he has either been kidnapped, or fallen asleep in his car with his foot on the accelerator, Daria sets out to find him. She transverses the vast wasteland that was once Lawndale in Vinny's van (now weapon be-studded, and heavy armored), in search of her Trent.

She battles her way across the shattered freeways and broken throughways, fighting the degenerate survivors of a consumer society, and occasionally taking out a fellow motorist for their fuel ("Sorry. It eats gas"). She finally encounters Upchuck, who attacks her from a 2 seater ultra-light helicopter by dropping snakes on her, and screaming when she fires back "Feisty!". She handily kicks his butt, and reduces him to a harmless quivering blob. He docilely follows her van in his mini-chopper, and serves thereafter as an annoying and useless presence.

Daria and Upchuck eventually find themselves surrounded by barbarians on motorbikes and dune buggies, and trapped in an abandoned outlet shopping center. There they find the tattered remains of the Fashion Club, some of their hangers on, and the two kids from "Pitch Sitter" dressed as fashion don'ts. Quinn tries to convince Daria to save the Fashion Club by helping to get them, and a tanker truck filled with the worlds only remaining supply of pore refiner, to safety. Daria reluctantly agrees to drive the tanker after Quinn "accidentally" discharges the contents of a grenade launcher into Vinny's van.

Outside the fortified perimeter of the outlet center, we find that amongst the degenerate consumers at the gate are the "3 J's" who repeatedly try to slash their way in to take Quinn on a date. Brittany and Kevin are there too. Brittany is trying to come up with a really good moral booster for their team, but is having a problem incorporating D-E-G-E-N-E-R-A-T-E B-A-R-B-A-R-I-A-N-S into a cheer.

Robert and his friends are also there. They know Daria is in the outlet center, and feel they the need to hassle her, but are not sure why. The whole clan is being unwittingly lead by Ted, who believes that he is back in the Lawndale video arcade, playing the "futuristic dystopia" scenario on the virtual reality system ("This is a really long game, guys!").

(I fell asleep somewhere around this point. I woke up during a scene where Daria is driving the tanker and firing shots out the window with a sawed off shotgun, and is being reloaded by the little boy from Pitch Sitter. Next thing I knew, Joe Bob Briggs was giving the Drive-in Totals for the next movie, so I gave it up for the night).

Reviewer's note: This was the first full-length motion picture that Daria herself produced and directed. Jane refused to participate, after she discovered that she had no funny lines (no one did) and her scene walking the poodle had been cut.

In parting:

Jane: Why do I get such pleasure from this?
Daria: Past life as a barnacle?